Birth Story: Maximiliano Lazaro DelaFuente | El Paso, Texas | El Paso Photographer
So I’ve sat in front of the computer too many times wanting to publish Maximiliano’s birth story but it hurts me so bad that his birth didn’t go as planned. With Eli, I never had a birth plan. All I wanted to do when he was born, do skin to skin, and soak up every minute the first hour as a family of 3. That never happened. Eli had complications. I only got to see him for 3 seconds before they took him to the NICU. He ended up being in the NICU for 10 days. With Max, I was determined to do that skin to skin and then bring Eli in so he could meet his little brother. Well guess what, none of that happened.
Max’s due date was October 15th, 2018. We (Uli and I) didn’t think I would make it to his due date. Eli was born at 38 weeks 4 days, so we were surely convince he was going to come early. My doctor offered to induce at 39 weeks but I wanted to let nature take its course.
October 8th: 39 weeks pregnant. When my doctor checked me, I was barely 1 centimeter. I had been at “barely 1 cm” for weeks. So I figured I would start cleaning I probably vacuumed and mopped the floors 3-4 times that week.
Let me add that I had been having Braxton Hicks since 20 weeks. They happened so often that I never paid attention to them.
October 11th: Uli had tickets to go see Escape the Fate, Famous Last Words, Picturesque, and Set to Stun. I had joked around that maybe a rock concert would put me in labor. I had been fine all day. As soon as we got to Tricky Falls and the music started, I had this weird feeling in my pelvis. It felt like my pelvis/hips were being ripped apart. I never had this with Eli. It continued until we went home. I never timed it because I didn’t realize they were contractions. They were completely completely different from being in labor with Eli.
October 12th: I don’t remember much
October 13th: We went to Chase the Taste to celebrate my brothers birthday and then later that evening we went to my cousins Halloween birthday party. Contractions were happening all day but they were never consistent. They would be 7 minutes apart and then all of a sudden they went back to 20 minutes apart. They never let up though. I thought by Saturday night, it would be time. I would have have contractions 5 minutes apart for an hour and then all of a sudden they were back to 20 minutes apart. I was able to sleep through some of the contractions. Every now and then one would wake me up.
October 14th: I was still having contractions. They never stopped. I told Uli, why couldn’t we get this over with and just have this baby. Some contractions were mild but majority of them, I couldn’t speak through them. Again my hips and pelvis felt like they were being g ripped apart. They were 5 minutes apart, then 20 minutes, then back to 5 minutes. They were crazy! We decided to skip church and try to get the ball rolling. We went on a walk with Eli, I vacuumed and mopped again. We took Eli to lunch and dinner because I had a feeling this was going to be his last day as an only child. I called my sister before I went to sleep and told her to keep her ringer on. She was going to take care of Eli. We were on baby watch. We go to bed and I’m still having mild contractions.
October 15th DUE DATE: Around 1:30 a.m, I wake up to worst contractions that I have felt in my life. Eli’s didn’t compare to these. I cannot sleep at all. Uli is still passed out so I decide to time them myself. For a good hour they are 5 minutes apart. I wake up Uli and he says “if they’re still going until 4:00 then we’ll go in.. I’m going back to sleep.” So I decide to take a hot shower to see if would help the pain. Holy. Moly. The hot water felt nice but I knew I couldn’t stay in there long. Uli would have complained about all the water I was wasting. After another 30 minutes, I wake him up and I’m like “nope we aren’t waiting, we need to go in now.”
He started showering and getting ready. Luckily I had my bag, Uli’s bag, and Eli’s bag sitting near the door for the last couple of days. While I waited for Uli, it felt like an eternity. I may have told him, to hurry his ass up. We woke up Eli and got in the car. Car rides and labor don’t mix very well for me. Contractions and bumpy roads SUCK.
We met my sister in parking lot so she could pick up Eli. I started crying and Eli told me “it kay, mama” while rubbing my face. I remember it was so cold and windy. I had a thin cardigan and the walk from the parking lot to the building felt so long. Cue all the crying emojis
My sister sent this to me while we were walking to the hospital.
We had to go through the emergency room because it was like 4:00/4:30 in the morning and all the doors were locked. When i went to check in at the er, they couldn’t believe that it was my due date and I was in labor. They took me back to get all my vitals and information, the nurse again asked what was my due date and I said “today”. She was like “are you sure?” and we were like uhhhh yeah.
They took us up to L & D where they checked me and I was at 5cm. I had some relief that things were moving along.
Last belly picture before they admitted me.
I got the epidural right away because I wanted to sleep some. When they gave it to me, it only worked on one side. They had to come back and fix it.
The doctor on call decided to give me antibiotics which now that I think about it, there was no reason to. There was no fever nor did I test positive for Strep B. Around 9:00 am a new doctor on call, decided to give me some Pitocin because the contractions were slowing down. I don’t even remember when they broke my water.
Mid contraction hahaha
At this point, I don’t even know what time it is. I just know it’s afternoon, it’s time for me to start pushing. I pushed for 30 minutes? 1 hour? I was soooo tired, I don’t even remember. I was having a hard time. My OB felt it was time to bring in the vacuum which I didn’t want but it was either that or c-section. She told me, she had three tries and if he doesn’t come out on the third, its mandatory c-section. I was freaking out. I didn’t think I would be able to do it. On the third suction, he came out. I heard him crying right away. PRAISE THE LORD. With Eli, there was silence because he wasn’t breathing when he came out. I cried. They handed Max to me and he cried and cried.
Then nurses and doctor became concerned that his breathing sounded weird. They took him from me. I had him for less than 5 minutes. Uli left with them to the nursery.
When Uli came back from the nursery, he said, Max started turning purple and stopped breathing. After they got him breathing again, they decided to admit him to the NICU. My heart sank. Here I thought it was a healthy delivery but I was wrong.
He ended up being in the NICU for 4.5 days. They couldn’t figure out why he stopped breathing. Then they thought something was wrong with his heart and after tests were run, his heart was healthy. He was the biggest baby in the NICU at 8 pounds 10 oz.
I had somebody tell me “oh so and so had the birth that you wanted” and it was like, there is no need to rub it in my face.
Having a SECOND child in the NICU was HARD. SO FREAKING HARD. I barely slept. I’d pump while trying to keep Eli busy. Leave Eli with my sister or Uli. Drive to the hospital. Drop off milk/have touch times (feed/change him). Drive back home. Only to be home for 30-45 minutes and do it all over again. You have no idea how many times I cried in the car. It was one of the hardest things I have ever gone through.
Right here is when I knew I need to take a picture to remind myself that if we got through this, we could get through ANYTHING. I also want to note that how do they expect mothers to not drive after birth the first couple of days. This baffled me but I still did it. OOPS.
Max was discharge on Friday, October 19th. I had to go home and get bigger clothes because Newborn was too small for him. He was wearing 3 month clothing. First day at home.
Here he is.. 3 days before his 1st birthday *cue all the crying emojis* We love this boy so much and Eli is obsessed with him. He call him his best friend.
This has taken me 1 whole year to publish his birth story. I am crying as I write this. I’m more angry that I just wanted a healthy normal delivery and I have been robbed twice. But in the end, Max is healthy and that is what really matters.
10/15/2019
Beautiful and creative. Thank you for sharing 🙂